WASHINGTON — As America prepares to celebrate its 250th birthday, left-wing media figures Sunny Hostin and Rachel Maddow reportedly reminded the nation that the country is a “failed experiment,” bravely delivering the message from inside a nation so oppressive it made them wealthy for complaining about it, sources have confirmed.
Hostin made the declaration on The View, while Maddow continued warning viewers that President Trump’s planned America 250 celebration may dangerously cause citizens to feel pride, unity, or a sudden urge to grill meat near a flag.
“This country is broken,” said one analyst while sitting under studio lights paid for by capitalism.
“And somehow, every single problem traces directly back to Trump, including inflation, traffic, bad weather, weak coffee, and whatever happened to them in 1997.”