There’s no place like home for the holidays.
1. Ilhan Omar
Topping the list is Democratic Minnesota Rep. Ilhan Omar. Omar was born in Somalia. She’s never really left it, in terms of loyalty and affection, that is.
Omar infamously advised America to be “more fearful of white men … because they are actually causing most of the deaths within this country. And so, if fear was the driving force of policies to keep America safe … We should be profiling, monitoring, and creating policies to fight the radicalization of white men.”
Omar has done her best to shrug off the Somali fraud in Minnesota, telling a Fox News reporter she had no regrets about pushing a bill linked to an alleged $250 million fraud scheme. Omar has called for the abolition of Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). She immediately reverts back to a blood-and-soil nationalist when it comes to her home country, of course, as evidenced by translations of her Somali-language speeches.
In the words of Republican Texas Rep. Brandon Gill, “America would be a much better place” if Omar were returned to her native Somalia.
2. Wajahat Ali
Left-wing commentator Wajahat Ali doesn’t seem to like white Americans. He makes no bones about it, at least.
“You have lost. You lost. The mistake that you made is, you let us in the first place. That’s the thing with brown people … There’s a lot of us. Like, a lot … And we breed. We’re a breeding people. And the problem is, you let us in 1965 … Once you let one of us in, you know what happens with brown folks? Our grandmother comes. Our grandfather comes. Our uncle comes. Our aunt comes. Our cousin comes. Our second cousin comes. Our third cousin comes. Then we have kids. A bunch of kids. And guess what? Some white women? You know, the Western civilization women? The pure women? The American women, quote unquote, the rust belt women? The real women? They like some of us brown folks. We don’t take ‘em. They come to us,” Ali said in a November rant.
“So we’re embedded. We are everywhere. We are everywhere … Brown people are everywhere … I want you to realize this. You have lost.”
Ali makes the argument for chain remigration on my behalf.
“Your story is a shitty story, filled with misery, it’s filled with bland chicken, it’s filled with terrible, terrible, dry ass meat, your music sucks, all your culture sucks … that’s why the kids listen to black people and their music, that’s why the kids love Latinos, your parties suck because they’re monochromatic, our parties have better food, better music, better looking women.”
Ali genuinely seems as though he’d be happier in Pakistan, or India, or Mexico, or any minority-white country. But he — and all his family members, evidently — still clawed their way into the United States. Funny how that works.
3. Drivers Who Don’t Understand How To Zipper Merge
A car from the left merges. Then a car from the right. Then a car from the left, etc. etc. Even hogs understand how to do it (as evidenced by this adorable video). Why does zipper merging remain such a persistent source of trouble for so many Americans?
The Trump administration needs to lay down the law: Get a chauffeur, learn to drive, or enjoy a one-way ticket to anywhere else.
Only for the Holidays? I think they should be deported FOREVER!